The men in your life create the container of safety for you to become a stronger man.
For most of my life, I didn't trust other men. I had a couple of male friends, but with other man I perceived them as competition on every level and as a result I might be friendly, but I distrusted them.
I didn't realize how this attitude was inculcated by patriarchal thinking. Patriarchal thinking tells men to compete with each other and a result it causes men to lose out a sacred and significant aspect of relationship:
The fellowship and brotherhood that all men need with each other.
I started trusting other men when I discovered how many other men were in similar situations like me. I started trusting other men when I saw other men doing the kind of internal work I was doing, because they wanted to show up in their lives in a different way. I started trusting other men when I recognized they were just as lonely and unhappy with their lives as I was.
Now I trust other men that I know are doing the work. I've got their backs and they've got mine and there is something so empowering about being able to open to another man and connect on every level, knowing there is an essential trust and brotherhood between us.
Men need friendship and brotherhood with other men. When you connect comfortably with other men you know those men will help you no matter what the situation is. You also know you'll help them no matter what the situation is.
When I started connecting with other men authentically they brought a level of accountability into my life I needed and pushed me to be true to my mission and purpose. They helped me transform my life in a way where I have become more driven and focused than ever on what really matters to me.
And I'm doing the same for those men I am in fellowship.
You are your brother's keeper. Watch out for your brothers and they will do the same for you.
